While I’m having a lot of difficulty making the mental changes needed as outlined in Your Money or Your Life, it’s easier to remember the motivation. I’m working today, a Saturday. And while it’s all legal and I will get “comp time” on another date, I feel a somewhat intense sadness that I’m living this life where I have no choice but to work according to someone else’s schedule. I’ve been thinking more and more about choice because while I feel powerless over most of my time, it’s all in how I look at it. As I go through the exercises about the value of my time, or what my hourly wage TRULY is according to the calculations in the book, I’m starting to learn more about choice. I’ve never been a real “keep up with the Joneses” type of person, but I definitely respond to marketing that says I “deserve” certain foods or jewelry or trips or treats because I “work so hard.” Would the inverse be that I don’t have to work so hard if I don’t need the material goods? And really, it’s not that I don’t want to “work hard” it’s that I feel I am spending a lot of time doing work for someone else. And if I analyze THAT, it’s not that I mind working for someone else, I’m just looking for work that is more meaningful. And then, I get stumped. I don’t even know what is meaningful to me at this point. How can I be 42 and not know what is meaningful to me?